Monday, July 22, 2013

Dingbattery


1. So, you turn on your TV to see a a crazy-eyed woman wearing tampons for earrings and yammering incoherently. It's gotta be either MSDNC or Lifetime.

2. Does Chris Matthews know you borrowed his tampons?

3. Now, that is one tight weave!

4. The accessories that tell the world you are "Ready for Hillary."

5. Rachel Jeantel saw this picture and said, "That's real retarded, sir."

Best of Double the U
You think this looks stupid but a few minutes later she had a bloody nose and she was prepared.

Best of  Dr. Doom
So if there was a sequel to The Blair Witch Project and Sandra Fluke starred in it and Ang Lee directed it... the beginning of the trailer would look something like this...

Best of  Submariner
    Looks like she picked a bad week to start using bath salts.

Best of ???
Latter day feminists, oblivious to the concept of penis envy, create their own version of Trucknutz

Best of ???
    Holy hysterical hyphenated harpies harmonizing about hymens, Batman!

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

C*nt-centric lines of force

metalgarth said...

you really don't want to know where she puts her earrings.

Double the U said...

You think this looks stupid but a few minutes later she had a bloody nose and she was prepared.

Dr. Doom said...

So if there was a sequel to The Blair Witch Project and Sandra Fluke starred in it and Ang Lee directed it... the beginning of the trailer would look something like this...

Dr. Doom said...

Looks like it is going to be a 'heavy flow' day...

prince of leaves said...

Kinda small, no?

Son Of The Godfather said...

Wish I had those things to cram into my ears before listening to that banshee.

chronos the wonder pig said...

sign the petition:

www.name the royal baby Trayon.com

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Things that can cause Surprise Face:
a) failure to notice little red ON AIR light's been lit for 53 seconds
b) way too much Botox
c) Coke bottle used as brow plucking guide
d) turnbuckles on a hair weave were over-torqued
e) indelible ink for the "look through these binoculars" gag

-OR-

Branded product immersion gone wild - Fashion Reporter Wanda Cleftlipp endorses Tampax. Next, zany Zeke Zlorp wears Depends and predicts a comfortably dry weekend.

Submariner said...

Finding out you'll be on TV when your laxative kicks in; PRICELESS! (at least for the viewers...)

Submariner said...

Looks like she picked a bad week to start using bath salts.

Kaptain Krude said...

You REALLY don't want to see her brother, Dingleberry.

Submariner said...

Kaptain Krude, I don't think I'd mind seeing her brother nearly as much as seeing her wear the earings he gave her last Kwanza...

Anonymous said...

Vinneh said:

They look better on boobs.

Anonymous said...

Thank goodness they're flushable; however, that cowpie they're around might still become lodged.

Anonymous said...

Gang Bang Misfits #6: Know Your Hole; Know Your Role

Anonymous said...

Latter day feminists, oblivious to the concept of penis envy, create their own version of Trucknutz

Anonymous said...

How can she shuffle her papers from dKos on air while sitting on both fists?

Anonymous said...

Box Instructions-No refunds for misuse of the product. Tampons are not intended to absorb any of the following: flecks of crazy spittle, bitter economic bile, or racial snake oil.

Anonymous said...

Holy hysterical hyphenated harpies harmonizing about hymens, Batman!