Monday, August 05, 2013

America's Brain Trust


1. Just to get it out of the way, "If you have a better way of exchanging long protein strands, I'd like to see it."

2. "Don't leave me in a room alone with her, Joe."

3. "Has that bust of Lincoln always been looking away in shame, or is it just since you three took over?"

4. "Knock it off with the gay jokes, Hillary. FYI: There wasn't a lot of hand-holding at Man's Country."

5. Hillary: And because you've been so good to poor old Hillary, I'll share a secret with you. This is no ordinary apple, it's a magic *wishing* apple.
Obama: A wishing apple?
Hillary : Yes! One bite, and all your dreams will come true.
Obama: Really?
Hillary : Yes, girlie. Now, make a wish, and take a bite.


Threadwinner metalgarth
    We're going to do something anal in an adult and pleasurable context. You in Hill?

Best of GregMan
    "Hil, we thought you'd want to be the first to know: Joe and I are getting married."

Best of Best of
    Obama's dog tries to run away with his homework.

Best of Son Of The Godfather
    At first, I thought this was Jeff Dunham and Walter, then I saw all of them were dummies.

Best of Son Of The Godfather
"OK guys, the hand holding doesn't phase me, but you're mistaken if you think no one can see you tickling each others palms with your middle fingers. Get a room."

Best of Submariner
    So Barry; what'd you and Joe do on your July vacation at Avaoln Manor?

Best of Best of
    A few bad apples

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
    Hope & Change reached its nadir when limp-wrist high fives became commonplace.

Best of Submariner
    ORA: Thanks Morpheus, but I think we'll all stick with the blue pill. We have THIS reality by the balls...



30 comments:

Anonymous said...

Lincoln wept at the sham of statecraft.

GregMan said...

"Hil, we thought you'd want to be the first to know: Joe and I are getting married."

GregMan said...

"Dammit, you stay right HERE, Joe, if I have to listen to that raspy screetch of a voice and smell those awful old lady farts so do you!"

Anonymous said...

Obama's dog tries to run away with his homework.

Dr. Doom said...

"So I hear the Congress has to sign up for Obamacare now", related Hillary, "Looks like I picked a great time to give up my Senate seat..."

Dr. Doom said...

"Don't you just love the new Crisco sculpture I commissioned for the Rose Garden," asked the President?

Steve O said...

Joe Biden looks so much like the 3rd wheel.

Anonymous said...

Vinneh said:

"Joe, Barry get me a brewski."

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Hold on, Hil... Joe has to go potty again."

Son Of The Godfather said...

Courtesy of Hootie:

Hold my hand
Want you to hold my hand
Hold my hand
I'll take you to the promised land
Hold my hand
Maybe we can't change the world but
I wanna love you the best that, best that I can
Oh, The best that I can

Son Of The Godfather said...

At first, I thought this was Jeff Dunham and Walter, then I saw all of them were dummies.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Quandry: The next President of the United States may very well be in this picture..

Solution: "Good afternoon, President Apple."

Son Of The Godfather said...

Barack and Biden - Thunder Buddies!

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Now I'd like for us to join hands in an attempt to summon the spirit of Che."

Son Of The Godfather said...

"What purpose does he serve? Yes, he's an idiot, but man, Joe gets me the best choom I've ever had."

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Wonder Twin powers: Activate!"

Son Of The Godfather said...

SO now Hillary's hosting "To Catch a Predator"?

Son Of The Godfather said...

"OK guys, the hand holding doesn't phase me, but you're mistaken if you think no one can see you tickling each others palms with your middle fingers. Get a room."

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Last one to touch me is racist!"

Kaptain Krude said...

"Blunder Twins powers: activate! Form of... a bald eagle wearing a wig!
Form of... a wet blanket!"

Anonymous said...

Goldfinger had a Korean manservant, Oddjob;
Soros has his handmaiden, Snowjob.

Submariner said...

So Barry; what'd you and Joe do on your July vacation at Avaoln Manor?

Submariner said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Submariner said...

Joe? He's my insurance policy against being the 5th Pres to be shot in office...

Submariner said...

Stop me if you've heard this one:
A 'tard, a mulatto and a harpy were meeting in the Oval Office...

metalgarth said...

We're going to do something anal in an adult and pleasurable context. You in Hill?

Anonymous said...

A few bad apples

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Hope & Change reached its nadir when limp-wrist high fives became commonplace.

-OR-

Thanks for spotting me a fifty, boss. So, that's 2 large anchovy pizzas for Hillary... anybody else want anything? Coffee? Tea? Croissants?

Submariner said...

ORA

Thanks Morpheus, but I think we'll all stick with the blue pill. We have THIS reality by the balls...

Submariner said...

Gozer the Gozerian... good evening. As duly designated representative of the United States, Joe and I ask you to cease any and all supernatural activity and return forthwith to your place of origin or to the nearest convenient parallel dimension.