Monday, March 24, 2014

Cue ZZ Top "Cheap Sunglasses"



1. Hilldog's Joo Janta 200 Super-Chromatic Peril Sensitive Sunglasses turned black the moment she took them out of the box and never changed back.

2. "I am Arachnia,Queen of the Spider People. Your worlds is mine. Hiss-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s."

3. The outrageous glasses were designed to draw attention away from Hillary's problem areas... cankles, gigantic hips, leaving four Americans to die in Benghazi...

4. "Next item on the auction block... the actual Beer Goggles Bill was wearing the night we first made the beast with two backs."

5. The glasses could mean only one thing... Janet Reno got rough last night.

Best of Submariner
    So Bill approaches Monica's boob like so...

Best of John Schneider
    Hillary chose to personify "Cheap Sunglasses" after she found out what "Pearl Necklace" was really about.

Best of Artfldgr
    Various assistants have commented on her need to pretend to be empress of the universe...

Best of Submariner
    Hillary holds up her favorite pair of Britney Spears' panties for bidding at her "What Does It Really Matter?" charity auction.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
    Part of Hillary's fake face falls off and the peoples' worst fears are realized.
    ORA V

Best of curly
    "They Live II": This time the ruling monsters wear the sunglasses.

Best of Submariner
    It's a well known scientific fact that C.H.U.D. can't stand either sun- or spot-lights...


21 comments:

Submariner said...

So Bill approaches Monica's boob like so...

chronos the wonder pig said...

"Look, I'm Lady GaGa!"

Dr. Doom said...

"Do these glasses make me look liberal?" asked Hillary...

Dr. Doom said...

"I see everything with perfect clarity now, personal responsibility, supply side economics, strong military, Reagan was right," whispered Mrs. Clinton. Hillary never should have tried on those Hannity.com gift glasses...

John Schneider said...

Hillary chose to personify "Cheap Sunglasses" after she found out what "Pearl Necklace" was really about.

Artfldgr said...

put that one aside for the presidential election season bumper stickers..

Artfldgr said...

How can she wonder why bill roams?

Artfldgr said...

Various assistants have commented on her need to pretend to be empress of the universe...

Artfldgr said...

Look what Mrs Obama loaned me!

Artfldgr said...

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens, dodging bullets in Bosnia, wishing i was Putin's misses... these are a few of my favorite things...

Kaptain Krude said...

"Good evening, my fellow citizens of the United States. I wish to announce that, effective immediately, I am divorcing my husband Bill. Since I like my last name of Clinton, I also am announcing my approaching marriage to the one and only George Clinton. Because, you know, once you go black, you can't go back. George baby, I ain't tired at all. Thank you, and good night."

George woke up in the coldest sweat of his entire life.

Submariner said...

"Fabulous!"

Hill does her best-ever, "down-low, Barry O at Man Country" impersonation...

Kaptain Krude said...

"Push out the jive, bring in the funk!"

Submariner said...

Hillary holds up her favorite pair of Britney Spears' panties for bidding at her "What Does It Really Matter?" charity auction.

champaignken said...

I wear my sunglasses at night
So I can, So I can
Watch you weave then breathe your story lines
And I wear my sunglasses at night
So I can, So I can
Keep track of the visions in my eyes
Hillary goes full-on Corey Hart and this press conference is the most informative one yet.

Submariner said...

ORA

"...a-ring-a-ding-ding-ding."

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Part of Hillary's fake face falls off and the peoples' worst fears are realized.
ORA V

-OR-

The old bat is a Comic Con alien cosplay freak. Who'd have guessed?

-OR-

Oh, Bill loves it when I wear nothing but these vintage sunglasses, a pointed 50's bra and a whip.
those off-camera noises would be Slick barfing into a bucket.

Submariner said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Submariner said...

Looks like Chris Matthews thought the other Clinton was speaking, AND that he can't distinguish between Hildawg's clenis and Bubba's johnson.

curly said...

"They Live II": This time the ruling monsters wear the sunglasses.

Submariner said...

It's a well known scientific fact that C.H.U.D. can't stand either sun- or spot-lights...