Monday, March 31, 2014

Hold My Place

Can you guys handle this one? It's my son's birthday. We're going to the range. Bang! Bang!


Best of Dr. Doom
    "City health inspection sir," explained Karla, "I have to check you for worms in the rear..."

Best of Dr. Doom
"Yes officer I have been a bad boy," replied Steve, "In fact I have been so bad that you'd better call for backup..."

Best of Submariner
    Looks like the Zucker brothers are remaking TJ Hooker...

Best of Dr. Doom
    "We don't abide speeders here in Hooker Valley Mr. Smith," explained Officer Shayla, "Now step out of the vehicle and assume the position..."

Best of chronos the wonder pig
    'I need to confiscate all the batteries in your car..."

Best of Son Of The Godfather
    "Don't taze me, ho!"

21 comments:

Robert said...

My, what a big baton you have.

Do you still want to show me your cucumber?

Respect my authoritah!

Dr. Doom said...

"City health inspection sir," explained Karla, "I have to check you for worms in the rear..."

Dr. Doom said...

"Safe School Czar, Enforcement Division sir, do you know why I pulled you over?" asked Officer Candy. "This is a clearly marked school zone and your peni$ is not openly displayed as required by statute..."

I almost said 'as required by penile code'... You're welcome...

Dr. Doom said...

A citizen receives a thorough screening at Checkpoint Charlie... Outside the gate at the Clinton Presidential Library...

Dr. Doom said...

If Larry Flynt was Secretary of Homeland Security...

Dr. Doom said...

"Yes officer I have been a bad boy," replied Steve, "In fact I have been so bad that you'd better call for backup..."

Submariner said...

Sorry Mr. "the K;" the monors are tired of your flimsy "I'm swamped at work" excuses - you'll continue to receive another citation every day they have to wait on the "Best Ofs." Of COURSE I'll be giving you these citations - why do you ask, and why are you snickering?

Stormdoggz said...

not to be a downer, but are you guys sure that is/always has been a woman?

Anonymous said...

Book 'em Dan-O !

Submariner said...

Looks like the Zucker brothers are remaking TJ Hooker...

Submariner said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Submariner said...

In the pron version of Willie Wank-ah, it's a skin flute that Will-she plays to bring out the Oompa-Loompahs...

Dr. Doom said...

"We don't abide speeders here in Hooker Valley Mr. Smith," explained Officer Shayla, "Now step out of the vehicle and assume the position..."

Dr. Doom said...

The HVPD's (Hooker Valley Police Department) 'War on Speeding' was not much of a deterrent but the fines did wind up defraying the cost of the Obama birth control mandate so everone was happy in the long run... Don't you love it when government runs well?

chronos the wonder pig said...

'I need to confiscate all the batteries in your car..."

Submariner said...

Not so ORA?

Even Officer Jones was surprised at LT Dangle going this far...

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Don't taze me, ho!"

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Things you did not know about the WWF #408: For fun (and exercise) male wrestlers dress up in drag, make fake traffic stops and pound the daylights out of drunk drivers who attempt a bad touch.

-OR-

This little old thing? It's for my pleasure. The billy club with your name on it is right here in my shorts.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Driver: It's an oral exam?
Copette: You're in Dallas. We like to call this field sobriety test Deep Throat. Open wide and say ahhhh, Debbie.

Submariner said...

"Out of the SUV, drop trou, and assume the position, maggot!"
'But WHY?'
"YOU'RE the one driving the Explorer, buddy..."

Kaptain Krude said...

John tried his best to maintain eye contact, but couldn't help himself when the officer told him that she was going to bust him.


wv: Officer ornnlysc. Huh, must be Irish.