A Right-Wing Christian Second-Rate Pr0n Blog
"F-ing cheap curtain rods!!"Jay contemplates a "plan B" after discovering hanging himself with the red scarf wasn't a viable option.
"But just think of the job I'll get with MSNBC or CNN after Obama is impeached!"
"I'm depressed, where's my chicken?"
Jay finally realized that, all along, it was Obama under the podium.
And so it was that laterAs the liar told his taleThat her face, at first just ghostlyTurned a whiter shade of Fail.
Bombs away! That'll teach Ed Henry not to park under the window.
Jay didn't want to kill himself; he just wanted to fall far enough to cause enough brain damage to erase the memory of the utterly humiliating last three years.
Jay thawtbubble: This sucks... Hey, Ang Lee is doing that remake of Captain Kangaroo... I wonder if that Mr. Greenjeans part is still open?
He sings, "glory, glory hole-a-lou-ya!"
Jay gave a party for all his White House Press Corps friends again, eh?
Jay texts: "Here I sit all broken-hearted..."
Thought bubble; "Al Sharpton questioned me as a valid Obama spokesman?! Al frakkin Sharpton!?! Questioned me?!?!Have I lost the ability to lie without a hint of conscience showing? Is it time to step away from the podium?"
Thought bubble; "How could they possibly think Dana Perino was a better spokesman than me?"
Thawt bubble "I am NOT a 'cock-juggling thunder cunt,' dammit..."
Jay Tweets to Press Corps: Three days, still no plumber. Resorting to nuclear option - the outhouse. Neighbors not thrilled. Bombs Away!
"I'm speaking to you from deep inside a real big empty."ORA Colonel Henry Blake M*A*S*H
CarneyBubble: Maybe Dad was right about liberals. Forty years ago a bunch of blacks moving out of a million dollar condo at 2AM would have drawn a little police scrutiny.-OR-I told the decorator these drapes were too sheer. After a hard day at work, I just want to come home, strip down to lingerie and relax, not be on stage!
Sad Jay Carney, and try everything inherently good as what it does.
"One...more...squeeze.....Ah! And that's today's press briefing done!"
Why is Jay sad?Thawt bubble; "Dammit - who moved my floor mounted brutal dildo?"
Jay snickers to himself; "Yep. Perfectly positioned! If that Eifful Tower was full-sized, I'd be one happy, happy, hapPAY Press Secretary..."
"Dang it, what do I have to do," asked Mr. Carney rhetorically, "Even when we hang floor length curtains in front of them, the President tries to exit through the windows..."
"Oh ennui. *sigh* At last, when most I need you, you have finally loosened your grasp upon me. Just like a rat deserting a ship, so are these the days of our lives. *sigh*"
"... and this is where we keep the truth..."
It's curtains for Carney.
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