Tuesday, May 06, 2014

Sad Jay Carney


25 comments:

jimmy said...

"F-ing cheap curtain rods!!"

Jay contemplates a "plan B" after discovering hanging himself with the red scarf wasn't a viable option.

chronos the wonder pig said...

"But just think of the job I'll get with MSNBC or CNN after Obama is impeached!"

chronos the wonder pig said...

"I'm depressed, where's my chicken?"

chronos the wonder pig said...

Jay finally realized that, all along, it was Obama under the podium.

USMC2841 said...

And so it was that later
As the liar told his tale
That her face, at first just ghostly
Turned a whiter shade of Fail.

The Expendable said...

Bombs away! That'll teach Ed Henry not to park under the window.

David said...

Jay didn't want to kill himself; he just wanted to fall far enough to cause enough brain damage to erase the memory of the utterly humiliating last three years.

Dr. Doom said...

Jay thawtbubble: This sucks... Hey, Ang Lee is doing that remake of Captain Kangaroo... I wonder if that Mr. Greenjeans part is still open?

Anonymous said...

He sings, "glory, glory hole-a-lou-ya!"

Submariner said...

Jay gave a party for all his White House Press Corps friends again, eh?

Submariner said...

Jay texts: "Here I sit all broken-hearted..."

Submariner said...

Thought bubble; "Al Sharpton questioned me as a valid Obama spokesman?!
Al frakkin Sharpton!?!
Questioned me?!?!
Have I lost the ability to lie without a hint of conscience showing? Is it time to step away from the podium?"

Submariner said...

Thought bubble; "How could they possibly think Dana Perino was a better spokesman than me?"

Submariner said...

Thawt bubble "I am NOT a 'cock-juggling thunder cunt,' dammit..."

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Jay Tweets to Press Corps: Three days, still no plumber. Resorting to nuclear option - the outhouse. Neighbors not thrilled. Bombs Away!

Carpe Phlogiston said...

"I'm speaking to you from deep inside a real big empty."
ORA Colonel Henry Blake M*A*S*H

Carpe Phlogiston said...

CarneyBubble: Maybe Dad was right about liberals. Forty years ago a bunch of blacks moving out of a million dollar condo at 2AM would have drawn a little police scrutiny.

-OR-

I told the decorator these drapes were too sheer. After a hard day at work, I just want to come home, strip down to lingerie and relax, not be on stage!

friv 4 said...

Sad Jay Carney, and try everything inherently good as what it does.

Uchuck the Tuchuck said...

"One...more...squeeze.....Ah! And that's today's press briefing done!"

Submariner said...

Why is Jay sad?

Thawt bubble; "Dammit - who moved my floor mounted brutal dildo?"

Submariner said...

Jay snickers to himself; "Yep. Perfectly positioned! If that Eifful Tower was full-sized, I'd be one happy, happy, hapPAY Press Secretary..."

Dr. Doom said...

"Dang it, what do I have to do," asked Mr. Carney rhetorically, "Even when we hang floor length curtains in front of them, the President tries to exit through the windows..."

Kaptain Krude said...

"Oh ennui. *sigh* At last, when most I need you, you have finally loosened your grasp upon me. Just like a rat deserting a ship, so are these the days of our lives. *sigh*"

Robert said...

"... and this is where we keep the truth..."

curly said...

It's curtains for Carney.