Tuesday, September 02, 2014
DWS Meets the People
1. Debbie Wasserman-Schultz explains to her constituents about how Democrats "embrace different standards of beauty" and therefore she ought to be considered hot.
2. "Show us your tits!" "One more outburst like that, and I'll have you removed Mrs. Ferguson."
3. "... And for a donation of $500, you gain the use of one 'Get Out of the Death Panel' free card."
4. "Perhaps Mrs. Ferguson can answer the gentleman's question: Why *are* tits so great?"
5. "Now, I understand the gentleman in back with the turban has a question for the 'Zionist Kike-bitch."
Best of chronos the wonder pig
DWS tell the crowd how pleased she is to be at the Glory Hole Recreation Area, and how she can't wait to find a surprise around every corner.
Best of The Expendable
"... And as soon as they finished, the horrified theater manager said, 'My God, what do you call your act?', to which the man proudly answered, 'The Aristocrats!' ... The Aristocrats... anyone? Is this thing on?"
Best of Carpe Phlogiston
It reportedly began as a soft chant in the far back corner, but soon the whole crowd at the Monkton Senior Living Center was yelling, TAKE IT OFF! TAKE IT OFF! TAKE IT OFF! at the new administrator. By the time SWAT arrived with their government-issued tank and crowd control flamethrowers, an hysterical Miss Smythers was down to just her panties and wristwatch. Seven seniors were treated for burns and rifle butt concussions. Eric Holder flew in to commend the police and give them another tank.
Best of Double the U
Yes,yes, the food and drinks are free and by free I mean you paid for it.
Best of curly
“In order for my speech here tonight to make sense, we’ve conveniently placed balloons of nitrous oxide around the room.”
Best of Dr. Doom
"And now, thanks to the President's community organizing skills, you can keep voting the ticket long after you are dead," explained Ms. Wasserman-Schultz...
Best of USMC2841
The Dem's plan to keep the Senate. "Now on your ballots er..Bingo Cards mark D-Michelle Nunn"
Gold Star Best of jimmy
DWS actually enjoys doing the nursing home circuit because they are more accustomed to the ravings of dementia patients.
Best of Mr Hankey
Sing "The Way We Were"!!!
Best of Best of
Will you please stop squawking and just give us our Liver Loaf. We were promised Liver Loaf. They woke us up from our afternoon nap because DWS said she was going to give us free liver loaf.
No Liver Loaf? No Peace. And no Senior Vote.
Guy in Blue Shirt... WTF is up wit yo hair?
Best of Submariner
DWS: "Vote straight Dem or you'll find out that Soilent Green is YOU people..."
Best of jimmy
"I have no idea what she's said so far; I am too distracted by that Adam's Apple. Man, it's like she's trying to swallow a tennis ball."