Tuesday, November 04, 2014

Scenes from a Democrat Rally


1. "When does Senator Matlock get here?"

2. "Vote with my uterus? WTF?" An old union man, Earl never quite got used to the new Democrat Party.

3. "Is this the Democrat Get Out the Vote Meeting or the Democrat Death Panel Waiting Room... (sigh) ... not that it matters too much."

4. Apparently, the promise of a Lena Dunham striptease is not the draw Democrats were hoping for.

5. Still half-expecting Norman Reedus to walk in and crossbow the lot of them.

Threadwinner: chronos the wonder pig
"Did we win?"

Best of Double the U
Excuse me, it is ten after.... I was told there would be coffee and donuts?

Best of Kaptain Krude
"The excitement level here is so thick, it would be nearly impossible to cut it with a knife," Tom intoned seriously into the camera. "This race is going right down to the wire. Back to you, Diane."

Best of Kaptain Krude
They should have stuck with a more memorable motto on the sign. I know where they could get a whole boatload of "John Edwards is Good" signs for cheap.

Best of Jay Guevara
Dem speaker: "And if we're elected, we'll provide you all with FREE BIRTH CONTROL!!"

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Precinct Monitors field questions from a well-informed electorate:
1. When's the movie start?
2. Is this where I get a flu shot?
3. Hey, I've been waiting 5 hours for my name to be called! What do you mean just go into any empty booth? I thought they were port-a-potties.
4. WTF? They bused me here to vote but then won't bus me back home? #$!&% lying ingrates.
5. Hola, soy un ilegal y he votado a los 6 recintos diferentes, pero nadie me ha dado un almuerzo gratis. ¿Dónde está mi almuerzo gratis? Me prometieron un almuerzo gratis!

Best of Rodney Dill
They said there'd be mashed potatoes.

12 comments:

Double the U said...

Excuse me, it is ten after.... I was told there would be coffee and donuts?

Dr. Doom said...

Looks like the President swept through and gave one of his 'Energize the Base' speeches...

Rodney Dill said...

Bueller.... Bueller... Bueller

Kaptain Krude said...

"The excitement level here is so thick, it would be nearly impossible to cut it with a knife," Tom intoned seriously into the camera. "This race is going right down to the wire. Back to you, Diane."

Kaptain Krude said...

They should have stuck with a more memorable motto on the sign. I know where they could get a whole boatload of "John Edwards is Good" signs for cheap.

Jay Guevara said...

Dem speaker: "And if we're elected, we'll provide you all with FREE BIRTH CONTROL!!"

chronos the wonder pig said...

"Did we win?"

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Precinct Monitors field questions from a well-informed electorate:
1. When's the movie start?
2. Is this where I get a flu shot?
3. Hey, I've been waiting 5 hours for my name to be called! What do you mean just go into any empty booth? I thought they were port-a-potties.
4. WTF? They bused me here to vote but then won't bus me back home? #$!&% lying ingrates.
5. Hola, soy un ilegal y he votado a los 6 recintos diferentes, pero nadie me ha dado un almuerzo gratis. ¿Dónde está mi almuerzo gratis? Me prometieron un almuerzo gratis!

-OR-

Voting, prostate exams and tax audits. Name 3 places where you wait in line to get butt-fk'd.

-OR-

My name is Chad. I'm going postal on the next person who asks, "How's it hanging, Chad?"

-OR-

"This time it'll be different."
bwahahahahahahahaha

The Expendable said...

OPLR (Obscure Punch Line Reference): "I'll take the soup."

Steve O said...

Bill Engvall said it first: "Here's your sign!"

Rodney Dill said...

They said there'd be mashed potatoes.

Jay Guevara said...

Democrat voters are fired up for Election Day!