Wednesday, January 14, 2015

I am stuck in an all-day meeting

See what you can do with this



Best of The Expendable
While his girlfriend shopped for shoes, Bruce amused himself in the mall's new "swordfight" kiosk.

Best of chronos z. wonderpig
at least the homeless (sort of) stopped masturbating in public

Best of Dr. Doom
Looks like the new San Francisco voting booths are quite popular...

Best of Best of
You'd think this German engineering would tap into vast reserves of untapped renewable-energy by some fancy electro-chemical process separating human waste. But inside there's a pee-drenched midget fräulein pedaling a stationary bike hooked up to a generator--with a web cam, of course.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
The mall architect was convinced the modern ad kiosk planters would be a hit until building maintenance reported they were being mistaken for porta-potties. Advertisers were quietly refunded their money.

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

Nope, sorry kid, she says she doesn't have any children, try the next booth.

chronos z. wonderpig said...

I see a lawsuit from midgets coming.....

The Expendable said...

While his girlfriend shopped for shoes, Bruce amused himself in the mall's new "swordfight" kiosk.

chronos z. wonderpig said...

at least the homeless (sort of) stopped masturbating in public

Dr. Doom said...

Looks like the new San Francisco voting booths are quite popular...

Anonymous said...

Australian space shuttles, Fosters-1 and Hogan-2, are fuelled and ready for take off.

Anonymous said...

Now adventurously amorous couples can feel the disappointment Superman felt upon finding a telephone kiosk instead of a booth--that or performance anxiety.

Anonymous said...

Muslim broad over Santa Drop Trou's shoulder gets an eyeful

Anonymous said...

You'd think this German engineering would tap into vast reserves of untapped renewable-energy by some fancy electro-chemical process separating human waste. But inside there's a pee-drenched midget fräulein pedaling a stationary bike hooked up to a generator--with a web cam, of course.

Anonymous said...

Grouting the street pavers in gold, a San Francisco civic project, proceeds ahead of schedule

dadoctah said...

It'd never work in this country. No handicapped access.

Dr. Doom said...

ORA?

Sadly Professor Frink's 'Embigulator' was an abject failure but as a nerd trap it worked pretty well...

Submariner said...

GLORY HOLE; UR DUIN IT RONG.

Dr. Doom said...

Drudge Breaking:

The NOW has begun installing a series of Self-service Urban Castration Kiosks (SUCK) in several major cities. In Berkeley, CA the SUCKs have been placed on Weiner Cutoff Road...

Carpe Phlogiston said...

AP NYC: Using the state's new sharia law approved by De Blasio, construction workers convicted of catcalling are sentenced to 14-days of public humiliation. The victim was stoned to death.

-OR-

Dude with his pants down:
Hey guys, would you write "For a good time, call Harry @555-2983" on the inside of your stalls?"
Sure, Harry

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Guy with head turned: Hey, Chuckie, stop staring! You're creeping me out.
Harry: Kid, you can come over here and stare at me.

-OR-

The mall architect was convinced the modern ad kiosk planters would be a hit until building maintenance reported they were being mistaken for porta-potties. Advertisers were quietly refunded their money.

-OR-

VtheK has to be the Threadwinner for claiming he was stuck in an all day meeting, then posting a "trapped in a porta-potty" selfie.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Hey, Gus, we ain't at the construction site anymore!
Candid Camera had a field day pranking hard hats in the year 2525 after teleportation was perfected.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Though Hoover's new Better Beaters self-service glory holes were a big hit among "tops" in San Francisco, "bottoms" filed a class action suit for alienation of affection.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Gus was grateful for friends when his nervous bladder reared its ugly head. Harry yelled words of encouragement while Rufus distracted him with existential factoids- "Downside of evolution, dude. Dogs lack self-awareness, hence they don't get nervous peeing in public."
Gus - So, you get nervous, too?
Rufus - Nah. heyyyyyy!

-OR-

The premiere of the Dr. Who remake introduces the Tardis Toilet.

-OR-

In the I Spy remake, the tennis cover story is updated to construction worker to justify frequent travel to the war-ravaged Middle East, and Robinson and Scott get a new partner... Bubba.

-OR-

Example of Hollywood's futile attempts to hype the new black James Bond movie, Golden Showers.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Harry's either peeing on the door or doesn't understand the meaning of urinal.

-OR-

The INhouse® will never replace the outhouse.

-OR-

The GOP sees this as a cheap, acceptable compromise to transgendered bathroom use.