Saturday, February 21, 2015

Air China


1. "Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherf--king pandas on this motherf--king plane!"

Best of Kaptain Krude
"See? It's right here in the guide book! I'm a panda. Pandas, and I quote, 'eats bushes, shoots, and leaves!' Now where is your girlfriend? I've got a bush to eat!"

Best of Dr. Doom
"I can see it is Vegan," said Mr. Panda, "But is it Organic? I specifically said I required Organic..." The emergent Chinese economy has created a whole new class of divas...
Best of curly
Dear Penthouse Forum, I never thought it would happen to me....

Best of Nose
Ladies and gentlemen, as we prepare to land please stow tray tables, raise your seats to their full upright position, and check the security of your bear's plastic diaper.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Just whisper three little words to me, Chang.
Mile High Club

9 comments:

Kaptain Krude said...

"See? It's right here in the guide book! I'm a panda. Pandas, and I quote, 'eats bushes, shoots, and leaves!' Now where is your girlfriend? I've got a bush to eat!"

Anonymous said...

After mating, the male leaves the female alone to raise the cub. First Class pimping, son!

Dr. Doom said...

"I can see it is Vegan," said Mr. Panda, "But is it Organic? I specifically said I required Organic..." The emergent Chinese economy has created a whole new class of divas...

curly said...

Dear Penthouse Forum, I never thought it would happen to me....

dadoctah said...

ORA: "Four-thirty, time for Wapner. Defin'tely time for Wapner."

Nose said...

Ladies and gentlemen, as we prepare to land please stow tray tables, raise your seats to their full upright position, and check the security of your bear's plastic diaper.

Submariner said...

"Enough is enough! I have HAD it with these motherf--king Chinese on this motherf--king plane!"

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Bamboo shoots, bamboo shoots, bamboo shoots! All you ever order me is bamboo shoots! Tell the stew I want a freaking Strawberry Daiquiri and I want it NOW!

-OR-

Of course you're not worried, Wang.... you're ghey! What about my baby batter? Those cosmic rays are frying my grapes!

-OR-

Mutual Thawtbubble: Are.You.Kidding.Me? You're watching oversize bewbs and eyes Hentai stuff when there's hot nubile jailbait sitting right next to you, Lee?
Lee Thawtbubble: No wonder you never get laid.
Bear Thawtbubble: No wonder I have body image issues.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Just whisper three little words to me, Chang.
Mile High Club