Friday, February 27, 2015

Teddy Ruxpin in Rendition


1. "For the last time... where is the bomb!"

2. ISIS released another horrifying decapitation video this week.

3. "Oh, bother..." Pooh regretted running afoul of the Chicago PD.

Best of chronos z. wonderpig
"It's baby powder, I swear it's baby powder!"

Best of Best of
Teddy Ruxpin realizes white privilege in a black world might look good on paper, but carries the weight of the world with it.

Best of Dr. Doom
Encouraged by the Valentine's Day success of its Big Hunka Love Bear, the Vermont Teddy Bear Company rolled out its Giant Pile O Blow Bear for St. Patrick's Day...

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Revised CIA Interrogation Techniques
Waterboarding = OUT
Terminator-flattening Hydraulic Press = IN

Best of jimmy
Winnie the Pooh's squeaky-clean image was tarnished this week after secret footage of a 1978 visit to Studio 54 was uncovered in news archives. Eeyore was said to be "greatly depressed" by the news.

Best of GregMan
The Holy Shroud Of Pooh was only brought out for viewing once every few years.

Best of Kaptain Krude
"You're not going to walk away from me this time, you chalk-face whore!" Ang Lee is at it again!

Best of tonn
Seth MacFarlane’s remake of Scarface, starring Ted opens next week, at a theatre near you

16 comments:

chronos z. wonderpig said...

"It's baby powder, I swear it's baby powder!"

Anonymous said...

Teddy Ruxpin realizes white privilege in a black world might look good on paper, but carries the weight of the world with it.

Dr. Doom said...

Encouraged by the Valentine's Day success of its Big Hunka Love Bear, the Vermont Teddy Bear Company rolled out its Giant Pile O Blow Bear for St. Patrick's Day...

Carpe Phlogiston said...

PETA Spokesvermin Toni Bortwelder later admitted her minions might have over-reacted slightly by burning the place to the ground.

-OR-

APPROVED!
NEA Grant #9270 - 3D Powder Art

-OR-

Revised CIA Interrogation Techniques
Waterboarding = OUT
Terminator-flattening Hydraulic Press = IN

-OR-

Toy Story 4 - Sam thought the abuse he suffered as a chalkboard eraser would haunt him forever, but then came a stint as a t-shirt screen printer's muse.

Anonymous said...

Cocaine... It's a helluva drug

Anonymous said...

Stop rubbing my nose in your white privilege!

jimmy said...

Winnie the Pooh's squeaky-clean image was tarnished this week after secret footage of a 1978 visit to Studio 54 was uncovered in news archives. Eeyore was said to be "greatly depressed" by the news.

Steve O said...

Ted sacrifices 2 years of sobriety for art.

GregMan said...

The Holy Shroud Of Pooh was only brought out for viewing once every few years.

GregMan said...

Teddy unknowingly created a new form of performance art when he tripped and fell after snorting his a$$ off with some primo blow.

Kaptain Krude said...

"Dude, I am high as fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck, man," Teddy giggled to himself. "I am so high, I can actually understand Obamacare! Dude, that's how high I am!"

Mr Hankey said...

"White and Gold" or Blue and Black"? I just can't tell...

curly said...

The drought is so bad here in California that interrogators have gone from water boarding to chalk boarding.

Kaptain Krude said...

"You're not going to walk away from me this time, you chalk-face whore!" Ang Lee is at it again!

tonn said...

Seth MacFarlane’s remake of Scarface, starring Ted opens next week, at a theatre near you

Anonymous said...

Subby said...

It appears the Amish Mafia are going to take an even darker turn towards showing their attitude about "the English..."