Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Shake Hand with the Mighty Gonga


1. "Then we have a deal. The young females are mine."

2. "Well, you seem like the kind of idiot rubes who would fall for my hackneyed cliches about helping the middle class."

3. "Mrs... Clinton... you're... crushing... my... hand."

4. "Now, I am going to hold your hand over the candle flame to prove your loyalty."

5. "Don't worry. I would never leave you folks to die in a Muslim hellhole under terrorist attack. Been there, done that."

Best of Best of
    Starbucks takes a page from Walmart's playbook and hires befuddled elderly women as greeters

Best of Son Of The Godfather
    "I've been living in a Scooby van down by the river."

Best of Best of
    If a chubby person looks slimmer in comparison to obese neighbors, then this butch stunt casting should pay off for K.D. Lang on the left

Best of Best of
    Larry King fools no one after Lasik and ditching the suspenders

Best of Jay Guevara
    "I like to meet people with diverse views. Which plant are you: the Marxist-Leninist, the Stalinist, or the Maoist?"

Best of GregMan
    "So you're that middle-class I keep pretending to care about."

Best of chronos z. wonderpig
    "Ok, $20 including head......"

Best of Son Of The Godfather
    "Deal! Let's go, My van's in the handicapped spot out back."

Best of The Expendable
    Just four gals, or variants of, out on the town.

Best of dadoctah
    "What do we have to do to get some nachos around here?"

Best of Mac
    And you must be the C.L.I.T. commander

Best of Dr. Doom
    "So we are agreed then," recounted Mrs. Clinton, "Once I am elected your, Amazon Army is at my disposal for the duration of the overthrow, in return the entire Washington Redsk... er... Native Americans will become your personal slaves..."

Best of Submariner
    Madame Secretary; "I feel like tacos tonight IYKWIMAISTYD..."

39 comments:

Anonymous said...

Poor old Granny keeps forgetting who Chelsea is.

Anonymous said...

Deft touch or daft clutch

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Look into the eyes of the dragon and despair!"

Anonymous said...

Starbucks takes a page from Walmart's playbook and hires befuddled elderly women as greeters

Son Of The Godfather said...

"I've been living in a Scooby van down by the river."

Anonymous said...

Few know that Piers Morgan had a sex change and is known as the sorceress Morgana, traveling palm reader

Son Of The Godfather said...

Check out the biceps on that lepricu*t.

Anonymous said...

No need to wait for jive tea, it's always brewing

Anonymous said...

If a chubby person looks slimmer in comparison to obese neighbors, then this butch stunt casting should pay off for K.D. Lang on the left

Anonymous said...

When "pull my finger" doesn't do the stench justice...

Anonymous said...

"Let's shake on it."
"Oh, sorry. I forgot about your foreign palsy."

Anonymous said...

Cross her palm with Centrum Silver and you'll have her rapt attention

Anonymous said...

Larry King fools no one after Lasik and ditching the suspenders

Anonymous said...

Smoke and mirrors in a shop that prohibits the former, with the latter deleted by customer request

USMC2841 said...

With her email server gone the technologically challenged, super rich grandma has resorted to palming notes.

chronos z. wonderpig said...

If she included head with Bill's massages she would have been President in 2001!

Anonymous said...

I promise you, within half an hour, a VERY camp climax.

Jay Guevara said...

"I like to meet people with diverse views. Which plant are you: the Marxist-Leninist, the Stalinist, or the Maoist?"

GregMan said...

"So you're that middle-class I keep pretending to care about."

GregMan said...

"How's your federally-funded birth control doing?"

chronos z. wonderpig said...

So it's a deal, you'll replace Huma as my ah, "personal assistant"

chronos z. wonderpig said...

So Obamacare pays for your birth control, BFD. Hillarycare will Pay You to use it!!

chronos z. wonderpig said...

"...and if you need a job, I know a massage parlor that's hiring."

chronos z. wonderpig said...

"Ok, $20 including head......"

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Deal! Let's go, My van's in the handicapped spot out back."

Anonymous said...

Cold hands, warmed-over Harf

Anonymous said...

Old lesbo's a real laff-in, claims she wants this blonde to "Psaki it to me."

Anonymous said...

Tests grip to assess applicant's ability to hold open the Crack of Doom

The Expendable said...

Hilldog meets the rest of her team, Fred, Daphne and Velma.

Rodney Dill said...

Hold on tight to your dreams.... 'cause the nightmare cometh.

The Expendable said...

Just four gals, or variants of, out on the town.

dadoctah said...

"What do we have to do to get some nachos around here?"

The Expendable said...

Upon learning that no tip was dropped into the Chipotle's tip jar, Ms. Rodham-Clinton slipped a quarter into Brenda's hand and asked her to take care of it.

Mac said...

And you must be the C.L.I.T. commander

Dr. Doom said...

"So we are agreed then," recounted Mrs. Clinton, "Once I am elected your, Amazon Army is at my disposal for the duration of the overthrow, in return the entire Washington Redsk... er... Native Americans will become your personal slaves..."

Dr. Doom said...

"Great job wiping the servers Sally, you really did me a solid on that one," congratulated Mrs. Clinton, "Take a couple of Priuses out of petty cash..."

Submariner said...

Madame Secretary; "I feel like tacos tonight IYKWIMAISTYD..."

Submariner said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Submariner said...

"Have you ever seen a clenis, sweetheart?"