Wednesday, September 30, 2015

#Caring


1. "There, there Mohammed. We have all lost sons in tragic clock-building accidents."
2. " I always get this way when I visit the 9-11 Memorial. Those poor, brave hijackers."
3. "What's wrong, Abdul. I thought your refugee status had been accepted?" "Yes, but they're sending me to Oakland."
4. "Hey, man, I know break-ups are hard, but you know what they say, 'There are plenty of other goats in the pasture.'"
5. "You smell nice. Is there anywhere you need to be right now? Would you like to come back to my place?"

Best of GregMan
    "I know, Achmed, I too am upset that Dicklovers is closing."

Best of Greg
    "Funny thing; that actually IS a bomb in my pocket! But yes, it's good to see you."

Best of Jay Guevara
    "You'll get over it. It's not you, it's me."

Best of Greg
    "It's okay; he WILL build that wall, and he WILL make the Mexicans pay for it, and then who'll be laughing, huh?"

Best of Submariner
    Sorry, Abu, but I have to go with Shazam on this one; Kirk WAS the better CO of the Enterprise...

Best of mega
    Didn't realize they'd repainted the Brandeis student lounge.

Best of chronos Z. wonderpig
    Hold me closer, tiny dancer........



24 comments:

GregMan said...

"I know, Achmed, I too am upset that Dicklovers is closing."

GregMan said...

"Mohammed, you know it turns me on when you chant 'Death to America'!"

Greg said...

"Funny thing; that actually IS a bomb in my pocket! But yes, it's good to see you."

Greg said...

"Well, your shoulders seem fine. Okay, now for the prostate."

Jay Guevara said...

"You'll get over it. It's not you, it's me."

Greg said...

"Yes, who doesn't want photos of young boys inside giant inflatable donuts? It's okay."

Greg said...

J. Crew shirt - $55. Banana Republic sandals - $88. Wearing one of Grandma's lace doilies as a hat - priceless.

Greg said...

"It's okay; he WILL build that wall, and he WILL make the Mexicans pay for it, and then who'll be laughing, huh?"

mega said...

"I said HARVARD."
"I'm sorry, Sheikh, please forgive me. I thought a community college would be an okay alternative."

Submariner said...

There, there, Ahmed... You can't be part of EVERY car swarm, but I promise you there will be others and you can lead the swarm next time...

Submariner said...

Well, MoHAMmed, (has anyone else ever noticed the irony in that name?) there is always a hint of truth in every stereotype so yes, our radicalism IS pretty accurate. Now get back to Incendiary Devices 201 before you miss the lecture on remote triggers...

Submariner said...

Sorry, Abu, but I have to go with Shazam on this one; Kirk WAS the better CO of the Enterprise...

jimmy said...

"Oh, Muhammad, everybody's looking at me!" *sobs*

"It's okay, Achmed. Sometimes that bargain bleach isn't really a bargain, after all. Next time, you and Abu need to use Clorox Extra Strength...."

Dr. Doom said...

Achmed: "Aziz, it is good to see you, you smell just like a goat's a$$"
Aziz: "Thank you my brother, I trust I do not smell like your goat..."

Dr. Doom said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dr. Doom said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kaptain Krude said...

♫♪ And Ieeeeyiiiiieyiiiiii will always love youUUUuuuuUUUUuuu ♫♪♪♫

Jay Guevara said...

"I wish I could quit you. You, and my pet goat."

Anonymous said...

"There, there, it wasn't nearly as good as your 'clock.'"

Rodney Dill said...

"Like all good ISIS fathers I teach my sons the ways of Islam.... How to shoot an AK-47, How to build a suicide bomb vest, How to damn all those that defile the Prophet Muhammad, how to proclaim the destruction of Israel, how to plant an IED, and the best way to decapitate an infidel. Look what little respect I get, As a father I do all this for them and then you put them in front of the TV camera and the first thing out of their mouth is "IMAM""

mega said...

Didn't realize they'd repainted the Brandeis student lounge.

mega said...

"See you in Germany in a month, my old friend."
"I thought we said Sweden..."

chronos Z. wonderpig said...

Hold me closer, tiny dancer........

Submariner said...

"There, there, Abubu; they just blow up so quickly these days..."