Monday, October 19, 2015

Burning the Feels



1. The Sanders campaign was an excellent product placement opportunity for the makers of "Oops! I Crapped My Pants."

2. Democrats love that 'Mime in a Glass Box' routine. They like a lot of things normal people don't.

3. And then the Scooby gang appeared and Old Man Sanders knew the gig was up.

4. "Hey, Lamar Odom, I'm open... to trying meth."

5. Can anyone prove to me that Bernie Sanders is a real person and not American Dad's Roger Smith in an old man fright wig?


Best of dadoctah
The Captain and Tennille have really let themselves go.


Best of jimmy
Reporter from off-camera: "Any truth to the rumor that you plan on nationalizing the adult-diaper industry via executive order on your first day in office?"


Best of Dr. Doom
Looks like some unsuspecting, misguided liberal is about to 'Feel the Bern'...

Best of Kaptain Krude
"Now this is one for you hep cats out there, it's a new hit with the kids out there, it's from those soul sisters that I can't resist-a, The Supremes, with 'Stop in the Name of Love'! Hit it, baby!" And the Democratic Monsters of Rock Party starts to wind up for a raucous election year!
 
Best of Kaptain Krude
ORA: "Can anybody hear that?," Bernie asked in a hushed tone. "I'm not really sure, but I think it's the Call of The Wintermoon!"

16 comments:

dadoctah said...

The Captain and Tennille have really let themselves go.

Anonymous said...

Woa Woa Woa Woa, I really didn't think things would get so bad this socialist shtick would catch on, I really have no idea what I am doing and don't know what I would do as president.

Anonymous said...

..... and then when I was seven or eight, Bernie took me behind the .....

Anonymous said...

I swear to you, I'm NOTHING like "handy" Joe Biden. Especially with HER!!!

jimmy said...

Reporter from off-camera: "Any truth to the rumor that you plan on nationalizing the adult-diaper industry via executive order on your first day in office?"

curly said...

“Emails? We’re tired of hearing about your stinking emails!”

GregMan said...

"I just realized socialism is a great big steaming pile of unworkable cr@p!"

GregMan said...

Well now we know where Bernie was when he crapped his pants...

GregMan said...

"They just called me a Communist! Oh, wait, I am a Communist!"

Dr. Doom said...

Looks like some unsuspecting, misguided liberal is about to 'Feel the Bern'...

Kaptain Krude said...

"Now this is one for you hep cats out there, it's a new hit with the kids out there, it's from those soul sisters that I can't resist-a, The Supremes, with 'Stop in the Name of Love'! Hit it, baby!" And the Democratic Monsters of Rock Party starts to wind up for a raucous election year!

Kaptain Krude said...

ORA?: "Not only are we going to New Hampshire, Hillary Clinton, we’re going to South Carolina and Oklahoma and Arizona and North Dakota and New Mexico, and we’re going to California and Texas and New York and we’re going to South Dakota and Oregon and Washington and Michigan, and then we’re going to Washington, D.C., to take back the White House! Yeah!!!"

Well, actually, the "yeah!!!" part of that was more of a wheeze than a scream, but you get the idea.

Kaptain Krude said...

"But wait!," Bernie said to the audience. "The girl convinced her suitor to drive off. And when they got back to her house, the young man jumped out of the car and walked around to the other side to open the door for her, like a young man is supposed to do. And what did he find there, dangling from the passenger side door handle? Why, it was the same hook that the Hook-Handed Killer was reported to wear!"

No one, but no one, can tell a better Halloween story than Bernie!

Kaptain Krude said...

ORA: "Can anybody hear that?," Bernie asked in a hushed tone. "I'm not really sure, but I think it's the Call of The Wintermoon!"

Dr. Doom said...

There is a 'phoenix rising from the ashes (of the dung heap that is the Democratic Party these days)' joke in there somewhere but I just can't drag it up...

Kaptain Krude said...

"Hold on, everybody, hold on," Bernie squeaked to the crowd. "I just realized that I'm old, Hillary's old, all of our candidates running for office are old. But we're supposed to be the party of youth and ideas! Wow, what a mind-blower! Now, let's never speak of this again!"