Friday, October 30, 2015

Why I Never Take Public Transport



1. ♪ "The Demon on the bus goes 'Eat your soul, eat your soul, eat your soul..." ♪
2. Every time I use the Metro, I always have to sit next to *that* guy.
3. That's weird. Usually, Valerie Jarrett doesn't even take the Metro.
4. Visine Eyedrop's first attempt at viral marketing was a huge misfire.
5. Laura sighed. Pan-the-Satyr was defying the restraining order... AGAIN.

Best of Submariner
    I thought Reverend Sharpton considered himself ABOVE public transportation?

Best of dadoctah
    I saw that demon from hell on the subway today again. Wearing f**k-me boots.

Best of Rodney Dill
    He'd be scarier, but he keeps humming 'City of New Orleans' by Steve Goodman.

Best of Kaptain Krude
    "I am so sick of these m*****f****** glowing-eyed demons on this m*****f******* train!"

Best of Dr. Doom
    Big Bird has really let himself go...

Best of jimmy
Rosie O'Donnell's estranged daughter keeps trying to move on with her life, but her mother refuses to let go.

Best of Son Of The Godfather
    That reminds me... Anybody seen Barbara Walters lately?

Best of Kaptain Krude
    "Excuse me, sir, but have you heard the good news about the Democratic Party?"

Best of chronos Z. wonderpig
    Why I always take public transport.

Best of metalgarth
    Slayer's album covers are starting to lose their edge

Best of curly
    "Manspreading' is tolerated by all when you're the Prince of Darkness.

24 comments:

Submariner said...

I thought Reverend Sharpton considered himself ABOVE public transportation?

dadoctah said...

I saw that demon from hell on the subway today again. Wearing f**k-me boots.

Rodney Dill said...

He'd be scarier, but he keeps humming 'City of New Orleans' by Steve Goodman.

Kaptain Krude said...

*sigh* "Oh ennui, when wilst thou loosen thy grip upon me? ... Seriously, ennui, when will you loosen your grip upon me? Being in the same car counts, you know! I mean, if you're just going to follow me around, I'll give you my itinerary!"

Kaptain Krude said...

"I am so sick of these m*****f****** glowing-eyed demons on this m*****f******* train!"

Dr. Doom said...

I did not know Godzilla had x-ray vision...

Dr. Doom said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dr. Doom said...

Later in life Godzilla would use public transportation to reach the city center. It wasn't nearly as dramatic but it was far easier on his knees...

Dr. Doom said...

Big Bird has really let himself go...

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Anyone seen my flock of sheep?"

Son Of The Godfather said...

In an ironic, post-mortem twist, Jerrod is actually forced to ride a subway for eternity.

jimmy said...

Rosie O'Donnell's estranged daughter keeps trying to move on with her life, but her mother refuses to let go.

Son Of The Godfather said...

That reminds me... Anybody seen Barbara Walters lately?

Son Of The Godfather said...

The Dark One manifested in a subway car to spread his message... Which, oddly enough was 'hands off my vagina!'

Kaptain Krude said...

"Excuse me, sir, but have you heard the good news about the Democratic Party?"

Kaptain Krude said...

Sometimes, Funtcuck has to come to you.

chronos Z. wonderpig said...

Why I always take public transport.

metalgarth said...

Slayer's album covers are starting to lose their edge

metalgarth said...

The only difference between our reality and Alternate Reality X24789 is that AC/DC's breakthrough hit was Subway To Hell

metalgarth said...

Kiss fans can go on the Kiss Kruise, Motorhead fans get the MotorBoat. But this is what Deicide fans are stuck with

metalgarth said...

NO MOMMY! I don't want to ride on the Baelzebus today!

Rodney Dill said...


Did he ever return, No he never returned. And his fate is still unlearn'd. He may ride forever 'neath the streets of Boston He's the man who never returned.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Not a caption, but damn you, Rodney Dill for putting that earworm of a song in my head. ;)

curly said...

"Manspreading' is tolerated by all when you're the Prince of Darkness.