Tuesday, May 23, 2017

The Orb of ... Something

1. "So, the Prophets have sent down another Orb from the Celestial Temple... and the last one to take his hands off wins! I got this!"

2. "Aw, come on, you guys, just let me touch the Infinity Stone. I promised not to unleash its power."

3. "I just figured it out. Orb spelled backwards is 'bro.' How cool is that?"

4. "The Orb of Prophecy just told me I'm gonna nail Major Kyra."

5. "The Orb has sworn its allegiance to me. Do not be afraid."

Monday, May 22, 2017

Back in the saddle again

Sorry about last week. I was sick with pneumonia. I didn't get much accomplished. Much less, blogging.

Friday, May 12, 2017

Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn! Ph'nglui mglw'nfah Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!

Giant Sea Creature washes up on Indonesian beach.

Shark Week After Dark

1. ORA: Troy McClure leaks sex pics in a desperate bid to revive his career.

2. "Don't ask me how, but I just got the greatest idea for a TV show," Mark Cuban said.

3. "Rick, when I said you needed to find your own 'roe to ho,' what I meant was..."

4. Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day... or do something so perverted it shocks all human standards of goodness and normalcy.

5. "I'm King of the World!"

Tuesday, May 09, 2017

Yeah, She's Not Even Hiding It Now

1. "Well, Christine, when you and Rachel Maddow invited me to attend a 'Women for Women' Event.... I was expecting something sort of different."

2. "... and in conclusion, let me just say to all attendees, there is no such thing as a natural heterosexual orgasm. Good night."

3. Judging from her hands position, Hillary is trying to explain heterosexual intercourse to the uninitiated.

4. Hillary was so out-of-it on anti-seizure meds she didn't even feel the tribble eating her foot.

5. "Oh, I've been into 'International Women' for years... have you met my special friend Huma?"

Football, Homoeroticism In...

Saturday, May 06, 2017

Throwback Thursday... on Saturday...

1. Akiro Kurosasawa's "Eyes Wide Shut."
2. Edna Mode saw this picture and immediately died of a brain seizure.
3. Production numbers like this were why Tommy Shaw quit Styx.
4. And this is why no one wanted to use the holodeck right after Mr. Sulu.

Tuesday, May 02, 2017

Maniac Pope

Vatican is my city. Never seenno titty. But I still spit fire like Diddy. Drop Psalms like bombs And prayers mad witty.